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4 yrs later...

Definitely needed to return to LiveJournal...I knew it had been a long time but 4 yrs?  Yikes....and they still kept my account open?

I so need to change my user pics...they are pretty bad.....
Ugh...I have been cranky the past few days.  It's that time of the month so I'm not surprised.  Tomorrow, I will be sending off all my application requirements for grad school.  This is it, I'm really doing it.  It feel kinds of weird.  It feels even more weird because I'm applying to Penn State.  I hope Notre Dame beats them this weekend.  Maybe they learned a lesson from Georgia Tech last weekend.

Beaches are cursed...

Do I ever have a good time when I go to an American coastline?  No.  Me = needs to stay away from the Atlantic Ocean...at least on this side of the pond.  Oh...and the shores of Lake Michigan as well.

My sister is such a bitch and my brother-in-law is a snobby dumbass.  While I love Alex and Ava, when did I sign up to make sure that one or the other of their parents takes care of them?

It was fun to hang out with Ava....she is totally girlie girl.  I painted her finger and toe nails and she had to go around and show everyone.  She's two by the way.  We made dribble sand castles on the beach yesterday.  Oh, and it is too cute when she sticks out her bottom lip so I can put lip gloss on her.

The character of Fez on "That 70's Show" was funny when Wilmer Valderama was younger but now that he's older, Fez is just plain creepy.

The movie from Great Britain where it portrays the assasination of George W. Bush is downright despicable.  I don't care who the President is but to portray him/her getting killed is ridiculous.  Get a life and why don't you try to change policy through positive means instead of negative, kid who plays too many violent video games means...

So anyway...
I'm cranky and I have a headache.  I'm about ready to get out of here, get home, pack, and get on the road to the Jersey shore.

Picked up Chuck Klosterman's new book last night.  I'm assuming he is probably liberal but not in that ultra-liberal annoying way.  And he's not blatantly political in his writing which makes it enjoyable to read his sarcastic, witty essays.  I give this book two enthusiastic thumbs up.

I started and finished a project today in about 30 min.  Ran mileages on some origin and destination points, none where within 50 miles of where we wanted them to be.  Analysis done.  No  backhaul opportunities which wasn't surprising in a lane that's only 97 miles.

Did I mention I have a headache?...grrrr....I need a "cranky" userpic

Aug. 30th, 2006

I'm thinking that I really don't want to go to the beach this weekend.  There are two things that are brewing that do not make for a good time.  First, it is supposed to rain all weekend.  Second, my family stuck in a house for any length of time is like throwing a stick of dynamite into a campfire and hoping it doesn't explode.

Fuck myspace...

My Space SUCKS for blogging...why did I even try when LJ has been sans difficulty for how many years???  If I type up an entry , wait forever for the next page to load and then get Sorry!  Unexpected error blah blah blah...again, I'll scream.  But oh yeah, I'm not even trying to post again.  And WTF?!  Apparently my picture with the Naked Cowboy in Times Square is inappropriate yet he's been on MTV and ads for the USA network...speaking of the USA network, is it the same one that used to have the USA Cartoon Express?

I just need to go back to the old pen and diary actually...

And I can't find the moon.  What's up with that?  For the first month I lived in my new apartment, I loved to lie in bed at night and see the moon framed perfectly in my bedroom window...now it's not there anymore and it's not because it's overcast!

And by the way, I'm 46 days sober and I think Effexor is the best thing that's ever happened for my depression...

Jul. 27th, 2006

OMG...I am so friggin' bored at work the past four days.  I literally have nothing to do...it like um, sucks.  But I did get emailed from the first dickhead I've met on MySpace so rock on!  And I also decided to post a blog flaming guys who only have friends that look, dress, and pose like Playboy models.  First off, those guys are obviously trying to prove or make up for something...little dick?  Low self esteem?  Denying they're homosexual?  (We can send you Lance to get over that.  I'm sure he can help.)  Second, I am sure that some of these girls have half a brain in their head and I am disappointed they have such little self respect for their bodies.  I'm just not one of those, "if you got it, flaunt it" types.  The guys who are worth my time will be willing to earn the privilege of seeing me in a g-string and my platform stripper boots ;)

Something that has me down...

Last night I went to Eleven50's website to pull off that picture of me from NYE 2004 and I saw entries for recent events there....it really got me down and made me miss Atlanta so much.  Their EDM events are so much more...abundant? than here in Philly.  And it's not just superstar DJs that come through there like PvD and Digweed....Hybrid, James Zabiela, Dean Coleman, etc.  I can go to events like that by myself.  I had no problem because I'd eventually run into someone I knew.

And now that my mixer is acting screwy, I can't even make some entertainment for myself.

I know I need to get out of my head and not think about how the grass is greener in Atlanta...but the more I think about it, that job at USF really screwed up my life.  Not only did they close and I had to move away but it took away any normal socialization which led me to the drinking.  I'm not necessarily blaming everything on that job but it was a big contributing factor.

I ain't counting anymore...

I am not counting days sober anymore because I keep screwing up.  The thought of "I threw x amount of sober days away" depresses me too much and like they say in NA...my sobriety is just for today and not for the past however many amount of days.

I just got pissed off last Sunday and it was the proverbial straw.  But  I have made up for it....and made an appointment with a psychiatrist for Monday.  I don't know if Lexapro is right for me and even if it is, I need medication management through a psychiatrist and not my family doctor. 

I was playing with my scanner and webcam...results are my new user pic and updated gallery.  I thought I'd be doing something tonight but I must have been smoking crack.  And the sad thing is that the only reason why I asked T if he wanted to do something was because I don't have any other options.  When and if he calls me ever, I'm going to answer my phone, get through the required hellos, then ask him, "What is 5 foot 6, has red hair and hangs up?"....and then hang up.  I have John to thank for that line.  He used to end his phone calls with "What is 5 foot 9, has a 4 inch dick and hangs up?"  You couldn't be mad becasue it was funny.  But in my case, I'm really not trying to be funny.  I'm trying to make a point.

Have I mentioned lately that I cannot wait to move?!

Day 22....Shopping!!!

I went shopping today so of course it was a great day.  My main goals were to find a new bedset since I'm going from a full to a queen bed and replace my long "pretty princess" hair fall.  I looked in Macy's, JC Penney's, Pottery Barn, and Strawbridge's with no luck on the bed set except for this beautiful Waterford comforter in a dark red brocade which was $300...yeah just for the comforter and that was on sale.  While it was gorgeous and I found it on eBay for $149, I still wasn't sure and I'm not sure I'm into buying bedding on eBay even if they say it's new.  So I started searching for Pottery Barn sets because there was the one I really liked but it was in a catalog like a year ago.  But I found it on eBay, went to PB's website and found it!  I love Pottery Barn!  Yes, I'm part yuppie or whatever they're calling those kind of people these days.  And now I'm wondering where in the hell is the Pottery Barn clock I got for Christmas!!!  I mean, it's a huge wall clock, I never hung it because I was too drunk but I'd like to where it is!

But here is my new duvet cover and shams....it's so pretty!


And I got my new fall and wee!  Strawbridge's is having a huge sale and those gorgeous Valerie Stevens brown sandals were 50% off.  I think I whined about this pair of shoes about two weeks ago when they were $115 full price.  But they had them in my size and they were half off....rock on.